pc catchall | homophonic | netzach

[metacognition]

code

      OBLOMOV.      

oblomov.
netzach.

❝ Now or never! 'To be or not to be!'"—Oblomov raised himself from his chair a little, but failing to find his slippers with his feet at once, sat down again. ❞

Comments

w2 saturday

[abstractart]

[hey man.

so the vibes are just. they're bad. primarily sad, a little weary resignation, a little worry.]

...sorry. I kind of hoped...

[metacognition]

Hoped for what, exactly?

[ fei du smiles. his emotions are just a void. he's holding the little egg he had at trial in his hands. ]

[abstractart]

...that what I was thinking was wrong again.

[the void is kind of nice, actually, thanks for this.]

[metacognition]

[ :') yeah! it's great! :') ]

No. You were correct on every count.

[abstractart]

I didn't-

[fuck. there's a bit of something that's not... really frustrated so much as a little helpless, when he pauses.]

...I don't know what to say, I guess.

[metacognition]

[ he huffs a laugh, quiet. there's a flicker in his own emotions, in that dark void, but it's something... sad.

after a long pause. ]

...In the end, I'd hoped to trick you all. Once it became obvious that the walls were closing in.

[abstractart]

...yeah. It seemed like it. I didn't really get it, since you're on the same team, but...

I feel like I might do the same thing in your place, too.

[metacognition]

I wish it had been me. Not her.

[ he says, eventually - short, less elegant than usual. almost brusque. ]

[abstractart]

-I wouldn't want it to be you, either, but- yeah. I get it.

[he'd want it to be him, too, over yuzu or zelda.]

[metacognition]

...Really, she ruined my plan, a bit. I'm not surprised.

[ there's a slight fond vibe there. his emotions are kind of dead inside but its still there. ] I was hoping that she wouldn't confess at all, and the blame could continue to lay on me.

[abstractart]

She... seems like the type to do that.

[there's something a little fond on his end too, in answer, though it also hurts a bit to feel.]

Reminds me a lot of someone I used to know.

[metacognition]

A friend from home?

[abstractart]

Yeah. Head of our research team.

[the feelings there, mentioning that person, are just a blend of grief, something a little nostalgic, and quiet, soft warmth. maybe love, if you look at it hard enough. he tries to sort of stifle it, but he's not very good at that.]

They're kinda similar, I think. I... wanted to keep getting to know her.

w2, sunday

[metacognition]

[ well

after all of that fei du is just outside of the house. he made it about three stumbling steps before stumbled into the closest bushes, dropped to his knees, and is just throwing up the entire contents of his stomach. his emotions are an unchecked fucking wreck, somewhere between complete and utter despair and fury and an unbelievable amount of disgust and nausea.

hey ]

[abstractart]

[hey... we're all doing great in this fucking CHILIS FROM HELL.

it's netzach's turn to be more of a void, his own despair muted and suppressed, but that probably has more to do with the fact that he's currently leaking the stuff he uses to get high from his eyes, crying electric green. it is, at least, absorbing into his skin before it can get anywhere else.

he just slumps to his knees next to fei du and reaches out to hold back his hair for him, like a drunk girl in the bathroom.]

[metacognition]

[ :man_standing:

thanks for that, man. when it seems like he's emptied out his entire stomach, he finally sits back - a little dazed. his emotions wobble, shaking like he's confused, and eventually, he seems to come back to some kind of reality as he pulls them back together, reaching up to wipe his mouth. ]

...thank you.

[abstractart]

...no problem, man.

[it's fine! it's fine. they are sooo fine.]

Should probably get you some water or something, right...?

[metacognition]

I can get some.

[ god. he pushes himself to his feet, albeit a little unsteady, and still as white as a sheet. ]

[abstractart]

[netzach follows, equally unsteady, reaching out to steady himself briefly on fei du's arm. it's not much of his weight, just stabilizing for a moment.]

'Kay. Walking it off a little might help too.

[does it? man. fuck if he knows. he's coming with, though.]

[metacognition]

[ that's fine. ever the gentleman, when he looks unsteady, he offers netzach his arm. by the time he's up he seems to be mostly back to normal, like a mask snapping perfectly back into place, save for how pale he is. ]

And a toothbrush. [ a little dryly. ugh. ] And a drink, would be wonderful.

[abstractart]

Can't really help with the drink... been out for a while.

[why buy beer when the psych is free? he does still like it, though...]

Maybe we can grab a couple later.

[metacognition]

I'd like that.

[ god. anything to get his mind off of everything that was - the wine works the best, helps to clarify his thought processes when it feels like something is weighing them down. ]

[abstractart]

We can message and ask, then.

[just probably monday because what's time.]

I could help too, but... up to you.

[metacognition]

Thank you for the offer, but I'll pass. I'm not much of a fan of that particular vice; it's never quite right.

[ nooo thank you to getting high. he had enough of that with the curse. ] You know the old cliche of the rich man's drug.

[abstractart]

The what?

[no, he doesn't, actually. explain.]